I’m scared. I’m absolutely terrified and that’s my problem. I have so little self-confidence that I don’t believe that anyone could be stupid enough to want me. I mean, just look at me. I’m scared I annoy you, I’m scared that I’m not good enough for you, and I’m scared that you wont ever love me. I can’t tell you how I feel about you, even now, because I’m terrified you wont feel the same. I hate living like this, and I need to tell you but I just can’t. I’m scared you’ll think I’m stupid, and that I’m desperate and needy and weird. I’m scared you’ll go back to wanting her, and that I’ll have nothing. I gave up so much for you, and I’m so, so, so scared that you’ll throw it back in my face. If you do that, I don’t know how I’ll survive. You’re all I’ve got, so please just stay.
we’re all trying so hard to pretend we’re happy all the time, but in reality, we’re all so very sad.
My mum is really, really, really starting to piss me off about this whole uni thing.
I’m going to Nottingham tomorrow and I’m gunna make my firm and insurance choices between Notts and Leeds when I get home, and reject the other two.
She’s just had a massive go at me because I’m not “thinking it through enough”.. Um yes I am. You have no idea how much research and stuff I’ve done, I have no idea why she’s so eager for me to go to Leeds, she’s confusing me so much. I’m not going there just because her stupid boyfriend supports Leeds United, it’s my life so I’ll do what the fuck I like with it. You know nothing, stupid bitch.
EUGH.
